"It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat." Theodore Roosevelt

Monday, August 26, 2013

New link for new blog below!

http://cranmede.tumblr.com 

Don't worry. Tabula Rasa isn't going anywhere!

Thumbin' my way into North Carolina

Today was the first Monday of the summer that I did not have to go into work. I rolled out of bed around ten, stuffed my face with Publix-brand cheerios, and sat myself on the foot of my bed to begin the mental preparation for this last week in Huntsville. I am spending this week prepping for my big move as I follow the words of, what has become a mantra for my generation, "Wagon Wheel":

Headed down south 
to the land of the pine
I was thumbin' my way into North Carolina
Starin' up the road
I pray to God I see headlights.

That's right, I am finally on my way out! This time next week I will be on the final leg of the 9.5 hour drive from these azure Appalachian foothills to the majestic beauty found in the blue ridge mountains of North Carolina. As I sit on the foot of my bed, which is covered with a somewhat endearing/ somewhat annoying coat of Samson fur, and I look around the bedroom I have grown up in and the boxes filling it I feel nothing but excited joy as I think about the next step. The next step is, undoubtably, forward. 

As I pack up the past 22 years into boxes and heave them into either the attic, a trash bag, or one of the piles that are sprouting from my carpet ("I will need this in NC" and "I might need this ...one day" and "This meant a lot to the 14 year old version of me") I realize just how much I have accumulated in my life. I've found old journals, old love letters and Valentine presents, old ticket stubs from the Hollywood 18 Harry Potter Premiers, a piece of road from Biloxi, MS I scavenged from Hurricane Katrina relief, my old scripts from high school plays, Artemis Fowl books, Pokemon cards, and an old story I work entitled "Why the Sun could Not love the Moon." So many memories are packed into this green square of a room and I am who I am today because of them. If you know me, or if you have ever ridden in my car, you know I am a packrat. I do it for the memories. Memories are fuel for stories, emotions, and life. So, as I sit in a haphazard "clean" room, synonymous to what many patients on "Hoarders" may habituate ink, packing up my memories I want to say thank you. 

Thank you all who have loved me well over the years. Thank you all for the good memories. They have been beautiful and full of cricket chirps and stars and Goldfish crackers. I want to say thank you to those who have challenged me, to those who have spurned me, and to those who have given me the metaphorical (or literal) biting of the thumb. I want to thank my erroneous enemies equally as much as my faithful friends. It is because of the challenges and the love that I am ready to tackle the next stage of life as a "Post-grad" human, being.

The Lord is calling me to North Carolina and I am ready to go. I am excited to meet him there and am expectant. I am expectant of much, fearful of a little, and eager for adventure. I will blog more this week and will be posting the link to my blog that will be specifically intended for my time pursuing my masters degree. [I'm taking suggestions for witty names]. 

Until then,
Cary

Friday, April 26, 2013

And then one year later I have time to blog

Last RUF event: Senior Desert 2013

Again I find myself ashamed and unworthy to claim the title of a blogger. The last post I made was about a year ago. That's pretty sad if you ask me. It would be hard to catch you all up on an entire year of my life, especially one such as jam packed as my senior year in college, but I can hit a few highlights.

Sad to see this chapter end.

Senior year at Auburn University has been a whirlwind. I always imagined my last year would be the easiest one; everyone finishing up classes, looking to our futures with confidence and assurance of a job or masters program and location, all that kind of idealism. As I sit at my desk at work (Oh yea- I got a different job! After Crepe Myrtle this summer I vowed to never again work in the food industry. Who knows if I can hold to that vow. This year I have worked as the assistant to the Dean and Administration of the Auburn University Libraries. It's been the definition of a dream job: passionate co-workers, fun environment, and a pretty awesome spinny-chair!) with only 8 days until I am an alumni, I can tell you that Senior year of college is one of, if not the, busiest of the four. Plans for the future will rise then crumble and it's not until at least the end through the first semester that anyone honestly knows what they are doing after graduation. Our whole lives we are told, "You can be whatever you want to be when you grow up! Go to college, then make it happen." Well, I know what I want to be when I grow up and I've gone to college but this whole, "and make it happen" stage is the hard part. It's also an unexpectedly exciting and fun part of life. I will be moving to Raleigh, NC to begin my MAC through the Raleigh Fellows Program on September 1st and I absolutely can't wait! At the start of the year my plan was Teach For America, I wanted it with everything in me. I made it to the final round. I was made a campus rep for Auburn University. I was told my final interview was one of the best they had seen. I didn't get it. But, in retrospect, thank God. I am so much more excited and better suited for a Fellowship than I could have ever been for TFA. My God is in control and his control, and his plan, is so much better than mine.

Beginning September 1st, I am a Fellow!

As classes are ending, my last undergrad class EVER is in two hours, I could not possibly be more excited. I had my last Creative Writing class yesterday and that was truly devastating. I have absolutely loved my major and my minors here at Auburn. I'm excited about the cessation of homework and trivial essays but I'm dreading losing the structure my classes have given me in speaking Spanish, writing poems and fiction, and-I never thought I would say this-I am really going to miss workshop! As classes end I hope to be able to continue to challenge myself in writing daily and practicing Spanish. I will never forget the lessons and love I've been given at Auburn and I look forward to sharing them with me into the world in a few brief months.


Below are some pictures to recap a few moments of joy from this past year. I will try to get back in the habit of blogging this summer when I am working back in Huntsville again. Senior year and college have been as brutal and fast as an Auburn thunderstorm. I look forward to watching growth in my life as graduation passes and life moves on. I thank everyone who has loved me well or loved my poorly. You have all taught me something and these past four years have been the most formative of my life. Here's to the next four, I'm looking so very much forward to what the future has to hold.

-CMB
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          Cruise with the amigos for our last Spring Break.

Finally touring Samford Tower with Cece.









College of Liberal Arts Calendar photo shoot.
First NOLA experience!
Game of Thrones Halloween 2013.
College formals ending.
Last time walking on the field of Jordan Hare.
Last away game as an Auburn student.

New puppy, Samson, became a Bayless!
Post FPO lunches in Auburn with the roomates.